Greetings from Margaritaville

As promised, I would share some rather unflattering pictures of David from this weekend in Key West. Ok, so he won't let me in case he runs for President, but I am sharing a few of all of us from our wonderful weekend. We first stopped at Robbie's in Islamorada on the way down-in case you've never been stop on the way down to KW-it's mile marker 75.5. You pay a few bucks to go out on the docks and feed these ginormous tarpon-I'm talking 6-7 feet long and 150 pounds. I had a great video of David trying to feed them, a few of them jumped out of the water and D squeeled like a 6 year old school girl. At least he got close to them, I was a total chicken.

The rest of the weekend was a whirlwind, it was our friend Ty's first time in KW, so we wanted to show him every inch (of the island you naughty fools-although it is KW and we did try to go to one clothing optional bar but it was empty). We rented bikes and cycled to all of the mandatory historical spots. We were dying of heat, and most of our stops were of the National Lampoon's Vacation type (take a picture and run). I won't bore you dear people with every detail, but there were some highlights: we went to this great shack by the water called Bo's Fish House-it looked like it was falling down and held together with chewing gum, there was a dirt floor, cats running around a few manaquins (sp?) laying around too. Note the picture of David sitting by the one that looks like a giant Ken doll. During the sunset at Mallory Square that evening, Ty somehow ended up in a Straight Jacket briefly in a part of one of the sideshows. I took a few pictures of the gorgeous sunset right after, not a bad job, is it?

Quick thank you to Jamie and Ted who were great hosts! They live in a fabulous house right north of Key West and let us stay there for a few nights. You are the best!

Sept 11th

Today marks the 5 year anniversary of a very horrible day in our country's history. It is one that I pray we will never see the likes of again. Everyone, in their lifetime experiences at least one moment in time so shocking, they forever define the moment by where they were, what they saw, what they felt... where were you when Kennedy was shot, or when the shuttle exploded , Pearl Harbor... every generation has at least one. I was not yet born when the JFK assasination occured, I came along decades after D-day, and barely remember the Challenger tradgedy. I am just grateful my child did not have to witness the 09/11 event. She is probably not even born yet.

I will always remember exactly where I was on that Tuesday. I was working at NCCI and the whole office, like every other one across the country, stopped. When I heard that a plane hit that building, I went numb. I have never been so terrified in my life. The office and everyone in it grinded to a halt as we all crowded around computer screens watching live video streams from the twin towers, the silence and gasps as the first tower crashed to the ground. We were all too stunned to continue to work. My brother was working at the Pentagon at that time. My manager let me go home so I could get in touch with my family. Because cell phones were virtually down that day, it took at least 6 hours for my brother to finally be able to contact my mother. Yes, many people died at the Pentagon that day, just over 200, but I thank God that the plane hit a section of the building that was all but unoccupied. It could have been much worse for them, and for my family. My old manager had a brother who was a NYC police officer, he died in the WTC that day. My family was blessed. My brother and I are much closer now I think, and a part of me believes it has to do with this day. I don't think he reads my blog, but if you do, I love you Bo Bo.

On this 5th Anniversay, may each of the surviving family members and friends of the victims of 9/11 find peace in their life and the ability to truly survive and continue on with life.

Margaritaville Bound

Gosh, my little blog has been so boring and un-funny, I can't even bear to read it lately! Really nothing new and interesting to report-adoption or elsewise. Time for a quick vacation (sans family, although I love them all...um yes sans family would be nice). We are headed to Key West aka Cayo Hueso in a few days. It will be so nice to shop-eat-drink-tan-sleep-repeat(not necessarily in that order) for three whole days! If I'm lucky I'll have a few pictures of D is some comprimising situations to post.

After this trip, we'll have to stay put for a bit because our little one will be home soon. No, not that little one. The dog-little one. Well, he'll only be little for a few weeks. I forgot to mention to D that labs can get to be 100 pounds. Shhhhh.......

Till next week!

Ernie was a big wuss

If you listened to the local media, Ernesto was a cat 5 monster. I have plenty of friends who put up shutters and are no doubt spending the day in their little caves. I am so glad, and so is D, that we decided to leave the shutters to collect at least a few more weeks of dust and cobwebs in the garage. Ernie didn't pack much of a punch, wind or rain-wise, but we still had a small hurricane, I mean tropical storm, I mean tropical depression, ok... passing shower gathering at our neighbors. They all played a card game and I played a few rounds, but mostly I passed the time stalking the new puppies. Here are a few of the now week old pups. They are starting to resemble some sort of canine. If you want to see what Finnigan will look like, there is a picture of proud papa Kiro(yellow in Japanese). Notice they all have pinkish brown noses just like their daddy. I think that is really cool because almost every yellow lab has a black nose, so Finni will be different. I hope the next 5 weeks fly by, I can't wait to bring him home!

The good, the bad, and the ugly

First the good: Meet Finnigan, the newest member of our family. Well, he will be in 6 more weeks. He is a yellow lab pup, but right now he looks like the cross between a guinea pig and a chihuahua. He's only 5 days old right now. Oh yeah, David caved. And I can't rotate the picture, I am a dummy. The little girl is our neighbor Shiori-one of the little girl's who are the owners of Finnigan's mom and dad. I can't wait to watch him grow! Of course, I already stocked up on toys, fancy bowls and other stuff. I've gotta spoil him, he's gotta follow in the footsteps of Quincy, the best dog ever...

The bad: We may have another guest, well, I am certain of it. His name is Ernesto and he is, or will be by tomorrow, a hurricane.

The ugly: I know, I know, stop reading Rumor Queen. The newest, most horrifying word is the the CCAA may impose new restrictions, and strict ones at that, immediately. By immediately I mean no grandfathering in those with log-in-dates. Some of the restrictions that are rumored about would kick us, and 50% of everyone else right out of the program. Like the soup nazi, NO BABY FOR YOU. Seriously, you can just lock me up right now if that happens. So, please, say a little prayer, wish on a rainbow, even rub your voodoo doll if you must, but just send good wishes this way. I need it.

August referrals are here

Well, the CCAA manages to get through a whole 9 days this time. Woo-hoo. They have been averaging this for the last 6 months. At this pace, we are looking at a 3 year wait. Ay-carrumba. I just opened a fortune cookie from the restaurant last night-it says "You will soon be crossing the great waters"-yeah, whatever.

Adoption for Dummies

Last night we met a few other FCC couples at Pei Wei for our bi-monthly dinner. After we finished eating, us gals decided to surprise out hubbies with a "Adoption for Dummies" trivia game. I was very proud of David, he came in a tie second place. Ed, who is traveling to get their little Samantha next month with his wife Wendy, won the game with a tie breaker question. His grand prize was a 6 pack of beer. The other boys good booby prizes-candy and slim jims. It was a riot. I think Pei Wei staff hates us, one of the girls went to the bathroom and came back and said "dear Lord, I can hear you guys from inside the stall", nice. Well, I guess since we are such a rowdy crowd we'll have to go to Chucky Cheese, but I am trying hard to never step foot in there, kid or not! I think the boys are threatening to give us their version of a trivia game, it'll probably involve questions on playboy centerfolds, NASCAR and computer parts.

Here is a picture of the boys after the game with their prizes. It looks like they have been drinking, but all we had was tea and sodas! The girls picture wasn't so flattering, my hair was all frizzy from the rain, so I'll pass on posting it.

One thing that came out of our dinner...we decided we are going to the airport at midnight when the Spector's come back from China with their baby and we are wearing our pj's and slippers (that is slippers, not strippers, Ron). We'll do it again in September when Ed and Wendy come back. It'll be so nice to see friendly faces when you get off of that 20 plus hour flight!

Happy 4 month anniversary

Ok, so I haven't celebrated monthly anniversaries since David and I's first year of dating back in college. I haven't eaten ramen noodles or drank nickle beers since then either. Alas, here I am looking forward to the 24th of each month, counting the days sloooowly, sloooowly. For everyone who promised the time would fly by I have one thing to say to you...Liar, Liar, Pants on Fire! Tomorrow will mark 4 months since the day we were LID (reminder for those of you international adoption for dummy readers-LOG IN DATE). I am in my second of probably eight trimesters-or octomesters more like it. I look pretty damn good for being 4 months (paper) pergnant, not even a pound have I gained! Of course, this is partially an effort by (shameless plug warning)-the detox treatment I got at my friend Amy's new spa Radiance (it's on the corner of Congress and Boynton Bch Blvd by the Pier One-tell her Kristen sent you : ) ).

We will celebrate with our fellow FCC gang at Pei Wei tomorrow night. The wives thought we'd make a trivia game for the guys since they are pretty much clueless abut the whole process. I am far from the only one who did 99% of the research and the paperwork and just said "sign here". People ask D what our LID is and he gives them a deer in the headlights expression. I think I'll start with the Jeapordy $100 questions for him-Ok, David-This is the country we are adopting from . Um, what is um, um, shut. I'll pass. More later on who won.

Sun, sand and boogies

D and I headed to Sanibel during the past weekend. It's a very quiet little island on the west side of Florida and it reminds me alot of what the Keys looked like when I grew up there. Not alot to do, just some island shopping, sunning and not much else. It was nice! We stayed with my brother, sis in law and their munchkins (3 now, 2 more on the way). We rented bikes and mozzied(am I spelling that correctly?) around the island. Here is a picture of the lighthouse and the beach. Had to include a few pics of baby Micheal from this morning, I caught a few candids of him on the other side of the patio door. What a cutie!

Quilt square update

I just counted...I have 108! Yeah! But, if you didn't get me yours(hellloooooo family on both sides...) I am still pleading to include one from you!

And the long wait continues

More confirmation that our wait will be a very long one. Our big China agency only just predicted that the CCAA will only refer two weeks of LID's per month from now on. That puts us at March 2008 for a referral and travel in May or June 2008-which is when the Olympics in Bejing are being held. Not good, not good. Putting fingers in ears and saying "la,la, la,la, la...I can't hear you...la,la,la,la,la...."!

A Few Good Eggs

Reading a really funny book right now that is helping me deal with the whole infertility thing. The first few months after our LID, I kept thinking "yippeeeee...we are off to China eventually!". Now that a few months have passed, the initial excitement has worn off and my thoughts have turned to: "we may not get to China for a few years and the fact that everyone around me is pregant and probably will be a time OR TWO more is really getting me down, man".

I picked up the book "A Few Good Eggs" and it has definatly helped me cope by allowing me to realize that my feeling of "womb" envy are quite validated. The book kinda like "taking Charge of Your Fertility" meets "Sex in the City". It goes on to say that it's ok if I turn down alot of baby showers right now, particulary if the person isn't one of my close friends. For close friends, the book says, suck it up and put a smile on your face. Now, for those of you reading this whose shower I did turn down this year (Neal, Janna, Sori), I really did have other events planned for that day. I have witnesses, I have alibis! It's ok to vent a little when someone else gets pregnant, but not to the person who is actually pregnant. I have been doing well so far by living up to these rules of infertility living. Right? Right?

Another section of the book titled "when people you love say stupid things" really had me cracking up. I have heard so many of these comments, especially number 1 and 4, and I heard both of these on Sunday. So, here is "what not to say to a friend experiencing infertility":
1. Just don't think about it, and it will happen!
2. Maybe you're trying too hard. (Which is the same thing as, don't stress about it and it will happen. That has NOTHING to do with old, sleepy eggs and two headed sperm-yes, it's a real thing)
3. But I bet it's fun trying (sure, it's a blast and so romantic with the thermometer and all)
4. Just start to adopt-then you'll get pregnant! That happened to my friend's sister's hairdresser's cousin's teacher.
5. You are really lucky-you can do anything you want. We never get to go out anymore.
6. Don't worry, your'e still young. (Actually, now that I am 33, my eggs are going faster than a speeding bullett-sorry that is the most clever thing I can come up with on my Benedrly haze)
7. Anything new on the baby front?
8. Are you keeping your legs up after sex?
9. Does your husband wear boxers?
10. Are you taking your temperature?
11. Are you using and ovulation predictor kit? (I had someone ask me that a few weeks ago, I said rather sarcastically before I could stop myself "No, what are those?". I have in actuality spend hundreds on those in the course of two years)
12. You should probably have more sex.
13. You probably need a vacation.
14. I get pregnant just by looking at my husband. (I used to get this a-lot)
15. Give it time.
16. You can have my kids, they drive me nuts.

One in 5 couples over the age of 30 experience infertility. If you know a married couple and they don't have a baby within a few years of marriage, there is a good chance they are having issues. Maybe they just don't want kids yet or ever, but chances are they are having issues and don't feel like discussing it. I am an open book, too much so sometimes, but others aren't. I now know not to ask the dreaded "So, when are you going to have a baby"?

If you have a friend who is experiencing infertility the best thing you can say is "I don't want to keep asking you about the baby stuff, if you need to chat/vent/cry, please know I am here for you".

That is our lesson for today, class!

Bon Festival

Last night we attended the Bon Festival at the Morakomi Japenese Gardens in Delray. For those of you who don't know, Obon (Bon Festival) is a Buddhist event and one of the most important traditions for Japanese people. It is the period of praying for the repose of the souls of one's ancestors. People believe that their ancestors' spirits come back to their homes to be reunited with their family during obon. I thought of my Dad and Quincy and Aunt Teri quite a bit last night, even though I am not Buddest nor Japenese (really, shocked, aren't you?) We had a great time, even though it was 182 degrees at 7 pm. Of course the reason I really wanted to go was to see all of the little Asian girls dressed in their kimonos. And plenty I saw! Our neighbors were there, and their little girls are part Japenese. They had their summer kimonos on and spent most of the night playing some Japenese game that allows you to catch a goldfish (not unlike those days at the fair trying to throw ping-pong balls into the goldfish bowls). I swear I am going to kidnap one of them one day, I am in love with them! Ok, patience Kristen, and her mom might not be too happy. I was going to post a picture, but it is taking an hour to download!

FCC friends

David and I have been so lucky to be in a circle of a great bunch of couples who are also on this crazy adoption roller coaster. We started getting to know each other at the end of last year through "waiting families" meetings and discussed everything from serious subjects such as attachment issues to not so serious subjects such as should the $3500 cash we are required to take to China be shoved in our bras or in our underwear. In the past few months we have "kicked it up a notch" to use Emerril's line. We now get together once a month or so and have dinner or a bbq. Not only do I feel like I have a special connection to these people because of the adoption, but all of our little girls will be good friends as well. It's so important that our daughters have their "Chinese sisters" to relate to and bond with. I am very much looking forward to that chapter in my life. I just wish it was happening quicker(we have the latest LID of the group) , but in the meantime, I'll enjoy watching all of our FCC friends bring their babies home!

mean hubby!

So, there is now another pregnant girl in my building...that makes 7. Her name is Missy and she is brown. She would give me her baby, but David said no. Now before you read that sentece twelve times...Missy is a chocolate lab and the daddy is a yellow lab. Her human parents will give us one for free! But no....David is a big meanie, he doesn't like the shedding. I have to do some serious whining over the next few weeks! Wish me luck!

Cheeseball Alert!

So, D and I started dance lessons of the latin type last night...samba, salsa, rhumba, swing (yup, it's considered a latin dance). Go ahead, laugh it up. This reminds me of one of my favorite scenes from 40 year old virgin.."Hey, you know how I know your'e gay?". It was a blast though. I thought I would do horrible, since I got kicked out of ballet when I was 4. My coordination has somehow improved during the last 29 years! I was actually quite impressed with myself, so was David. Even the instructor told us that we moved ahead much more quickly than 90% of his students. Then again 90% of his students are well, 90 I think.

Anyhow, if anyone is interested, they have three private lessons for just $20. It's a good "waiting for referral" distraction! We signed up for 20 lessons, we should be ready for season 5 of "So, you think you can dance?"! HA!

One small step....

Yesterday we received a nice surprise in the mail, it was the long awaited "brown envelope" . The brwon envelope is a letter from the American Consulate General in China acknowdedging that we have been approved by the INS to adopt an orphan from China. It doesn't really mean too much, it's just nice to know that they still have our file. The CCAA just moved offices over in China, and I was paranoid that our file would end up in a black hole! Right now, the reveiw room is going through the November 2005 files. Once our file is out of the review room(hopefully by the end of the year) we can breathe easier. After the review room, it goes to the matching room, which will take months and months and months. I believe we are still on track for an early 2008 referral, or early 2007 if we are lucky.

I added a new link on the right...it's a website desined specifically for April 2006 DTC families such as ourselves. We are called the Flying Tigers. It's nice to be able to chat with people who are in our same timeframe. We also do quilt square, kids books and secret pal swaps, it certainly helps to pass the time!

Everybody Hates Chris

No, not the show...never watched it. I am talking about the lovely little storm brewing by Puerto Rico and moving towards us. I feel like we just took our shutters down, and we did, just 9 months ago with Wilma. We are well prepared this year-we have a monster generator(good, becuase I just bought 3 weeks worth of groceries since David apparently couldn't find the store while I was up north). As Jimmy B would sing in one of his songs...tryin to reason with hurricane season.....

Back to the sunshine state!

I am so happy to be back to "cool" weather! It was 102 degrees when I left Maryland this morning. Holy Crap! It was too hot to do anything up there, so we couldn't do as many touristy things as usual, but I'll save those for when David and I drive up in the spring. We did get to go down to the Inner Harbor, went shopping and went to the Science center to see two Imax movies in 3-D. Saw a bunch of my family on Saturday and went to a very cool up-and-coming neighborhood called Canton for dinner and drinks last night. I had a prikley pear margarita and a quesadilla stuffed with crab, spinach, shitake, roasted red peppers and goat cheese. As if that wasn't enough to gorge myself on, we hit Vicarros(the famous Italian bakery) for a chocolate dipped cannolli afterwards. I cannot wait to get my butt back to the gym. The jeans that I had on the way up are too tight now. Embarassing but whatever.

On a very very ecstatic happy note, our friends Wendy and Ed received their referral yesterday for their daughter Samantha. She is too cute! The orphanages just love to dress the kids like they are going snowmobiling in Antartica for their pictures! I'll try to add a picture when I can, but I need to ask if they mind first!

Ok, off to unpack and smootch on my honey!

A small adoption update

Here is an article in a New Mexico newspaper. Finally, one congresswoman has listened to an adoptive family's plea to extend the 171H. She is going to try to get this bill passed. I really hope it does, I can't imagine having to redo EVERYTHING again and spend another 4 grand on all of the paperwork since our moneytree blew away with Hurricane Wilma last year:


Wilson Helps New Mexico Families with International Adoption
Introduces the Helping Families Adopt Orphans ActWashington, DC – Congresswoman Heather Wilson today announced she has introduced the Helping Families Adopt Orphans Act, legislation to aid families adopting orphans from foreign countries. “This legislation updates a policy on international adoption that makes sense, given the longer wait times families now experience in processing the adoption of orphans,” said Wilson. “This problem was brought to my attention by a constituent, and it is a simple change we can make to build strong families.”Andrew and Constance Johnson of Albuquerque had written to Wilson in May about the possibility that their I-171H form would expire before their adoption of an orphan from China was complete. “We wrote to Heather Wilson about our problem, and to our surprise we got a call from her office two weeks later saying she was introducing legislation to fix our problem,” said Constance Johnson. “My husband and I want to adopt a child from China, but we worry everyday that our paperwork will expire before we have our child. Reapplying would be expensive, time-consuming, and burdensome. The 18-month expiration no longer makes sense.” The legislation would extend the validity of the I-171H “Notice of Favorable Determination Concerning Application for Advance Processing of Orphan Petition” form to at least two years. This form is issued by the U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Service, an agency of the Department of Homeland Security. It is the final form needed to adopt international orphans and is the ticket to adoption for many families. The form is currently valid for 18 months, although the time needed to complete the adoption process has significantly increased over the last few years because of delays in travel approval, visas for orphans, and additional processing time to gain approval by foreign governments. The I-171H form has an application fee of $545, plus $70 per person for fingerprints. Several other forms are needed before receiving approval, including a home study to ensure the home is safe and stable, birth and marriage certificates, health and financial records, criminal background checks, and other information. The entire cost of international adoption can be thousands of dollars. If the form expires before the adoption is complete, a family must reapply and re-submit all applicable forms, fees, and evaluations. This can be prohibitively costly for many hopeful parents.