And I leave you with this Christmas wish....

Ok, so I can't think of anything overly warm and fuzzy to say to you all this wonderful Christmas night. I am in a "food coma" state(see previous entry). I did have to share these pictures I found online of the world's "Most Wanted" mall Santa's. Enjoy! And Merry Christmas everyone!

Eight is (not) enough

Tomorrow, Christmas Eve will mark our 8 month wait. I wonder if we are a third of the way there, or just a quarter? I do know that when 12:01 am strikes on Jan 1st, I can say and be 99% damn sure we will be parents the next year. Well, have to keep this brief, preparing a monster brunch for D's family on Christmas day. D said "Scrambled eggs and bacon is fine", but when it comes to me and my kitchen, I like to go all out. Want to see the menu? I am getting hungry just writing it! C'mon over, there will be plenty!

Cesear Salad
Vanilla Bean Sour Cream Muffins
Begals with choice of Strawberry Bruscetta or Smoked Salmon w/ Wasabi Creme Fraise
Charred Asparagus and fresh herb Frittata
Hash Browns
Coconut Panettone French Toast with a topping of mixed winter berries in a maple syrup infused whipped cream
Bacon and Sausage
For the b-day cake: Cassada ala Siciliana (Italian Spongecake with ricotta pistacio filling and chocolate espresso ganache )
Mimosas
Bloody Mary Slushies

Oz

Lately I have been having dreams that the CCAA is actually The Great Wizard of Oz! This news doesn't help "Agencies have been telling their clients that CCAA would no longer take calls regarding when referrals were coming or give out new measurements of infants who had been referred". It also said that CCAA would “report” agencies who did not comply with this request to stop calling them and asking them questions like this." This just came from another wiating parent, but still, it's probably true.

I picture myself as Dorothy, Toto is being played by Higgins our cat with Casey our other cat as the understudy, and David as the Tinman or the Lion or the Scarecrow-you pick. We are standing in front of the giant Oz asking him nervously where our daughter is and when will I see her. Then the curtain gets pulled back on some 95 pound Chinese woman who is screaming "Pay no attention to the person behind the curtain, I am the great leader of the CCAA!" The wicked witch in this is, of course, the USCIS. Anyone who is going through this will appreciate that. The good witch is our FCC group, and the yellow brick road is the slow boat to China. I think SNL could do a skit on this, don't you think?

Article in the Wall Street Journal

No kiddin! I love that they are trying to increase the number of babies available instead of making them grow up in orphanages, but I think it's awful that single people can no longer adopt.


Agencies: China tightens adoption rules

(Beijing-AP, December 19, 2006) - China is tightening rules on foreign adoptions, barring parents who are unmarried, over 50 or obese, but says it will try to increase the number of children available to those who qualify, according to U.S. adoption agencies.
The move comes amid a surge in foreign applications to adopt Chinese children. The United States is the number one destination for children adopted abroad, but the number going to Europe and elsewhere is rising.
The restrictions are meant to limit adoptions to "only the most qualified families," said the Web site of one agency, Harrah's Adoption International Mission in Spring, Texas.
An employee of the government-run China Center of Adoption Affairs, the agency that oversees foreign adoptions, said it has issued new guidelines but refused to confirm the details released by the American agencies. He wouldn't give his name.
A U.S. Embassy spokesman in Beijing said it was looking into reports of the new regulations. He spoke on condition of anonymity in line with embassy rules.
The Chinese agency also is trying to increase the number of children available by creating a new charity to improve conditions in orphanages and "keep infants and young children alive and well enough to be adopted," Harrah's said.
Americans adopted 7,906 children from China in 2005, raising the total since 1989 to 48,504, according to the Joint Council on International Children's Services in Alexandria, Va., an association of adoption agencies and parents' groups. The group's Web site lists 110 U.S. groups that arrange adoptions from China.
Under the new rules, only people who have been married for at least two years will be eligible to adopt, according to Harrah's, the New Beginnings Family and Children's Services Inc. of Mineola, N.Y., and Families Thru International Adoption Inc. of Evansville, Ind.
Beijing previously allowed adoptions by unmarried foreigners. The agencies said Chinese officials disclosed the rules at a Dec. 8 meeting in Beijing. They take effect May 1.
Among other restrictions, couples must have a Body Mass Index - a measure of obesity - of no more than 40 and be aged 30-50, with people up to age 55 considered for children with special needs, according to the agencies.
The rules bar parents who take medication for psychiatric conditions including depression and anxiety or have "severe facial deformity."
Many Chinese children adopted abroad are girls who are given up by couples who, bound by rules that limit most urban families to one child, want to try for a son. Others are left at orphanages or by the roadside by unmarried mothers or poor families.
A sharp increase in foreign applications for adoption has led to a backlog in approvals, with waiting times rising from six months in early 2005 to as much as 15 months now, according to adoption agencies.

A new look

I was getting a little tired of the bright pinks and yellows and blues of my blog, they were a little too "Miami Vice" for me. Not the Miami Vice with Jamie Foxx, the Miami Vice of Don Johnson Days. What do you think, a little classier now?

Always a bridesmaid and never a bride....

More like always an auntie and never a mom. Yesterday I became a proud aunt for the 7th and 8th time. Meet Allison and Gregory. How in the world my sister-in-law Shelley had twins sans drugs is beyond me. She is a super hero in my book, or just downright nuts. Allison was born at 4:05 weighing 5lb 6oz, then came Gregory into the world at 4:10 weighing 4lb 9oz!!

A picture is worth a thousand words

Here are a few pictures from our days in paradise....thank goodness David did catch any of me in my fallen poses.....

Falling forward

Just returned from an amazing trip to Park City, Utah. I have been lucky enough to have skied in several ski resorts all over the US and in Italy and this was by far the best ski trip thus far. Some of the trails are incredibly long, so you spend much more time on the trails and not waiting to get on a lift chair. Park City actually has three seperate ski areas all within ten minutes of each other and there is a great little downtown area full of cool shops, bars and cafes. We even went to the Olympic Park and got a chance to witness a live Bobsledding trial up close. They go so fast you jump if you are anywhere within ten feet of the track. On the last night we went tubing so we could revert to our 5 year old selves (like we didn't do that the rest of the trip).

As for the skiing, I somehow managed to stay in an upright position and did not fall once the first three days. Amazing for a soul as accident prone as I am. On the third day we rode up a lift with a ski instructor-a Cuban dude named Orlando originally from Miami. On the 15 minute ride up to the top he asked if I had taken a lesson and I told him it was my 7th time skiing. He told me everyone should take a lesson and gave me one, for FREE (hello, private lessons are over a hundred bucks an hour-cha ching) on the next trail down. He actually helped my technique quite a bit, even though I still, well-suck. Like I said, I did great until the very last hour of the very last day. Read on.

Here are a few lessons I learned this trip:

1. It is nearly impossible for a girl to do the hover and pee move while wearing ski boots. I can't quite explain it, except that it seriously cannot be done.

2. The "Please wait" sign posted on the padded gate as you wait for the next lift chair is there for good reason. On the last day I was so excited to get back on the mountain that the top half of my body was working much quicker than the bottom half-my skis were a few feet behind my head-not good. When my turn came to get on the ramp to wait for the chair, I had one of those "yellow light" moments-ya know, the kind when you are driving along in your car and you are 20 feet from the light and it turns yellow and for a second you are debating whether to stop or go? I totally should have stopped. All of me. I got my jacket caught in the damn gate since my feet were so far behind me. Down I went in front of a nice long line of laughing (ok, in their heads they must have been) spectators.


3. The "Please sit all the way on the back of the lift chair" sign while boarding the lift chair is also there for good reason. In one of my least proud moments, I somehow managed to not get my fat butt all the way on the seat before we were at least 6 feet up in the air. David was talking to me one second and the next he was looking down 90 degrees to see me laying on the ground like one of those CSI Miami victims that got pushed off of a roof. Fortunatly David Caruso was not present, but instead there were two cute ski lift operators there who picked me up under my arms and loaded me onto the next chair, but not before my graceful actions made all 100+ passengers swing in their stationary chairs while I was placed in the next chair.

4. The "Please keep your tips up" sign while unloading the lift chair is also there for good reason. You think I would have this embedded in my tiny brain by now, but you start chatting with the very interesting couple from Boston sitting next to you, you go to get off, and BAM-you find yourself french kissing the end of the snow covered ramp.

5. It happens to everyone, right? Well, 2, 3 and 4 would not have been quite so bad if it hadn't all happened in sequence. I kid you not. If I had a tail, it would have been between my legs. And that brings me to #6....

6. Just when things couldn't get more humiliating: I was just boasting before my Three Stooges impression that I hadn't fallen once-and then after making an arse out of myself on and off the lift I took a deep breathe and promised myself I would finish out the day without any further incedents-at least I hadn't actually fallen while actually skiing. Yeah-good job. I obviously couldn't find a wooden tree to knock on. That very next trail off of the cursed lift was actually a cursed trail. I fell not once, not twice, but three times. There are several types of falls people have while skiing. They range from "God, I am so STUPID" to "God, Please let me walk again". My three falls were something in between with the last one closer to the latter type. At the end of a very long, but beautiful run over covered bridges and under tunnels my left ski hit a few rocks and off went my ski-at least 20 feet below me. My pole was 20 feet above me. I usually love when I find a quiet trail with no one around for minutes at a time but not at this instant. David was already around the corner and didn't see my acrobatic display. I lay there in pain for a few minutes before crawling uphill to retrieve one pole before sliding ass first (how many time can I use the word ass in the post) to retrieve my ski. My binding had ice shoved in every crevice and my boot just would not go back on. Finally two snowboarders came by, I thought they would help me. Instead, being the nice teenage idiots they were, they sprayed me with snow from the edge of their boards and laughed as they sped away. Nothing like adding insult to injury. All I know is that David, who had stopped to wait for me when he noticed I wasn't behind him, didn't know I was laying helpless on the hill until he heard me screaming "#$&%*&@@@&*%^*^&%&*" at the punks. Hubby finally met me halfway as I walked down to meet him. Luckily I was close to the lift back to the lodge at that point. I was so done.

7. Not that this has anything to do with skiing, but I would move out west for the good hair days alone. No flat iron needed.

I can't wait to go back-next time I will just try to adhere to the signs.

20 hours and counting

We are off to Utah for 5 days of powder skiing in less than 24 hours. I am getting absolutly zero work done today. I am breaking the refresh button on the weather.com and skiutah.com pages. It was negative five again this morning, warmed up to 10 above, think I'll bring my bikini and flip flops! Will post some pics when we return! Have a great week!

The newest Palm Beach FCC referral

One of our group members, Belynda just got her referral yesterday. Her name will be Tatiana, she is only 9 months old! I love the baldness, her husband told her "look honey, she has your smile, and my hair", I love it. I am so happy to be living vicariously through other FCC families lives while we are waiting, it makes it all the more real! I can't wait to go to the airport with the other waiting families and welcome her home!

November Referrals

Congrats to all those who will soon meet your babies! The CCAA just sent referrals for those with LID's of 08/26/05 and 09/08/05. A measly 13 days. Not even a half month. This wait will just keep getting longer. I don't think we will meet her until after the Olympics in Bejing -summer of 2008.

In the meantime, I will share the newest Marvin cartoon...I hope this looks like our Thanksgiving table next year....

New, slightly healther, yet temporary obsession

For the past few weeks I have been a good girl and only stalked the rumor queen pages a few times a day. Why the change you ask? I have found a new reason to wear out the refresh key.

www.skiutah.com

It's 11 degrees and snowing there today. 24 inches in the past 2 days...we are off in 6 days, 12 hours and 18 minutes, not that anyone is counting!

Today's episode is brought to you by the number 7

Just passed another LID anniversary on Friday. Luckily, we were so busy in Atlanta that I truly did not think about the wait at all. I thought about the adoption and we all talked about Amelie, but the wait did not get to me at all! We'll have to get out of town more often-oh wait, we are! Off to Park City, Utah in 9 days!

Georgia on my mind

Just got back from our Thanksgiving week in Atlanta. It was nice to get away to see my brother and sis-in-law, but wish we had a few more days with them. It took us 13 hours to get up there because we worked on the way-we had to find hotels and restuarants with wireless services but we got the job done. Ok, so a little run down on our trip:

On Wednesday while David went to a library to work, Devanie( my sis-in-law) and I went shopping for Thanksgiving dinner at the DeKalb International Food market. If you ever in Atlanta, you must go there. It's an indoor market the size of 3 Costcos. The veggie and fruit section is the size of a Publix and had produce from all over the world, most of which I had never heard of before. There are two full aisles full of marinades and dressings, two ailes just with teas and a huge ginormous wine section. I could spend the day there just browsing, and we nearly did because of the amount of shoppers there. After our shopping exursion, we picked up David and went to see her new pottery/glass-making studio. We then went to the Atlanta Cycloroma and learned all about the Civil War. I am usually bored to pieces by that type of thing, but I enjoyed it very much. We then walked around the adjoining park and admired the fall leaves. That night we stayed home and made some preperations for the next day. We also got into a few bottles of wine, and danced around the living room all night. My brother put on a Led Zepplin DVD and I told him to turn off the Whitesnake. That was the laugh of the trip....but I guess you had to be there. Poor Devanie who rarely drinks was in no shape to cook the next day. Good thing she made the pumkin pie at 2 am, even though she doesn't remember. It was actually quite good!

On Thursday(Turkey Day), we made the rest of dinner, watched the parade and the dog show(a stupid poodle won, again...but a Wheaten came in 2nd place in the terrier group so I was thrilled) then ate our big fat meal, wacthed football, drank some more wine and hit the hay early(must have been the wine/turkey tryptophan combo.

On Friday my brother had to work, so David, Dev and I went to Stone Mountain Park and climbed to the top to work off the 10,000 calories consumed the prior two days. It's just 1.4 miles to the top, but some of it is steep and slippery and my buns felt like buns of stell after(sadly, they don't look like it). We parked over 2 miles from the actual mountain (it's really a giant hill made of granite), so it really was a good workout. That night we went out for Italian (because we needed to replenish the 10,000 calories we burned) and then to a funky bar/restuarant to meet some old pals I hadn't seen since high school for some drinks. We had been in touch for months now looking forward to meeting up. They even called a few hours before and said they had a sitter, but alas....I got stood up. Oh well, I just got to catch up more with my family.

That's it folks! Trying to get my brother and SIL to get their buns down here, Dev has never been to Key West and it's about time. I think we could tear up that town! It's sad that we go almost 2 years without seeing each other, but maybe once Amelie comes they will miss her and we'll see them more often.

Road trip

D and I are heading to Hotlanta to see my brother and sis-in-law for Thanksgiving. I hope that by the time we get back, there will be some update as far as rumors go for this month's referrals. I pray they do more than two weeks this time! Happy turkey day all!

Unreal

This is from an article in a UK newspaper, I can't imagine how I would feel if I were in these people's shoes!

Police sorry after race-quiz outrage

Police have apologised to a white dad who was quizzed by officers after taking his two mixed-race daughters out for a pizza.
Paul Wrightson was questioned by the officers because they thought a white man with two Asian girls was suspicious.
But it has sparked fury from the family and particularly Mr Wrightson who fears he will be under suspicion when out with daughters Sita, 18, Asha, 15, and Sonia, 13.
Mr Wrightson, 43, of Bingley, has been married to his Asian wife Sherlinda, for 19 years. He had taken his two younger daughters for a treat at Pizza Hut in Bingley on Monday while their mum was busy helping a friend when he was asked by two Police Community Support Officers (PCSOs) to accompany them outside.

"We had caught the train from Forster Square in Bradford at about 6.40pm on Monday and we got off in Bingley. I took the girls to Pizza Hut for a treat and I had just finished my pizza when I noticed the officers come in.
"I joked with the girls that they were probably coming in for their tea. The two officers came over and asked me to come outside.
"One officer stayed in the restaurant with the girls and the other explained that a member of the public had seen a white man with two Asian girls acting suspiciously," he said. The officer asked Paul if he could prove he was their father and he explained that he didn't have any sort of documentation because he had met his girls after work to get some dinner.
Paul said the PCSO told him it looked strange a white man being with two Asian girls. "I just gave him my name and my date of birth," he added.
In the meantime a female PCSO asked Asha and Sonia who Mr Wrightson was and they also explained that he was their dad.
Asha also told the officer that she was embarrassing them and that the whole restaurant was looking at them.
Paul was eventually able to go back to his daughters who were visibly upset by the questions that the officer had been asking. "Is it getting to the stage where I can't go out with my own daughters?" asked Paul, who works at Dudley Hill Carpets.
Sherlinda, 46, who is a catering assistant at St Luke's Hospital, told the Telegraph & Argus that her daughters and her husband were all very upset by the incident and in particular the way that the officers handled the situation.
"I was devastated when Paul told me what happened. I've never come across anything like it my life. I was beside myself and one of my daughters had trouble sleeping that night," she said.
Paul has received an apology from an Inspector and Sergeant at Bingley Police Station and he hopes that this does not happen to another family.
"I shouldn't have to explain to anyone who I am when I have done nothing wrong expect take my daughters out for a meal. This may have been the first time that this has happened but does that mean it is going to be the last?"
Sherlinda said that she hoped the police would be more sensitive and a bit more open-minded in the future.
"They should be more open- minded, I mean we are living in a multi-cultural society. When I married Paul it was in more difficult times. I expect people to more open-minded now."
A spokesman for West Yorkshire Police said: "We responded to a report made in good faith by a concerned member of the public. We apologise for any inconvenience or embarrassment that was caused."

Just a little cuteness to brighten up the day

This is an adorable picture of Samantha, she will turn one in just a few days. I am looking forward to being at her very first birthday party!

Also had to show you another too cute comic!

Adjustment issues

On Tuesday we went to our monthly FCC meeting. There was an attachment therapist there who gave us waiting parents (and a few already back folk) some great advice on dealing with attachment. Alot of this I have heard before, but it doesn't hurt to hear it over and over again. For instance, as much as we want our family and friends to be able to hold and hug and kiss on the Empress, this is a huge no no. The biggest piece of advice she could give is don't take any advice from people who only are parents to bio kids. How you raise bio kids and adopted kids is a 180 degree difference. I am already getting the deer in the headlight look when I tell friends and family that the Empress will be sleeping either in our bed or in our room for at least the first year. This goes against everything a bio child should do. Strollers are strongly advised against, they want her to be carried in a snuggli for as long as possible. No trips or vacations for the first year either, unless it's a quiet trip to see family and even then the babe needs to be within eyesight 100% of the time. Another must: limit stimulation-have very little toys around and keep the nursery-if you have one as she will be in our room-in minimalist style. Use red if you can, because that is the one color that is everywhere in China. So much for my pottery barn watermelon pink and lime green theme! The most interesting thing she should have is us.

Why all of these crazy rules you say? The first year she is home, we must recreate for her what the first year would have been like if she was ours biologically. She needs to become totally dependent on us. Even if she is 18 months when she comes home and can feed herself, we can't let her. I know alot of people looking outside in will think us FCC parents are over protective, too uptight, somewhat nutso, but these things must be done in order to have a healthy toddler and a healthy adult later on. The thinking is she must go through all of her stages, even when we have to start at stage one.

Some other interesting advice the therapist gave us:

- Practice alot of eye contact, usiing mirrors if she won't look directly at you

-Learn a few words in Chinese. While we are in China, she'll still have some familiar smells, tastes, ect...but once we get home, everything will be unfamiliar. Kinda like taking someone from Amish country and bringing them to Vegas by themselves. It would probably be frighteneing. If we speak some Chinese to her, she'll have something familiar to her.

-Exchange something of value for something the nanny or fostermom wore, so that she has that familiar scent around her.

-Buy a Chinese lullaby cd to play at night.

-when you hold her to rock her to sleep, cradle her in your arms so she can have that eye contact.

-Tell her that she had a story before she came in her forever home, she wasn't just adopted, she was born.

-One Mother's day, light a candle for fer birth mother. This will help deal with the grief she will always have.

One thing I was very happy about Tuesday was the new families that I met. We are no longer the last ones to get our baby. Two new couples have Oct 06 LID's, and they will travel after us. I am not trying to sound selfish here, it'll just be nice to have people before and after us!

Comic Relief

Did you see in the daily comic page that Marvin has a new little sister? Just adopted from China. Love it! Check more of her out here ! Her name is Ming Ming. Kinda sounds like a panda's name, but still....

Lucky

Although I really would love to see a few leaves change color or some snow on the ground, I am so happy to live in the Sunshine state. Friday we met some friends who were in town from Michigan. They went scuba diving that morning and caught twentysome lobsters and a giant grouper. We reaped their rewards and stuffed our bellies with the delicious crustaceans and fish fillets that evening. Tonight some friends from college invited us over to join them in enjoying a fresh caught dolphin they caught off of a drift boat earlier in the day (is that a run-off sentence, sorry Professor Rose). One day D and I are going to live in the Keys (where I grew up) and live like the song "Tin Cup Chalice" by Jimmy Buffett. My favorite line is "Give my oysters and beer, for dinner everyday of the year, and I'll feel fine".

On another note, just want to say congrats to Cyndi and Jon & Fernando and Neal on their beautiful new two week old babies! Lily and Sebastian are so stinkin' cute! Remember a few months ago when I whined, I mean wrote about how everyone I knew was pregnant. Well, now everyone I know has a newborn. Well, almost everyone. My sis in law is having the twins anyday now, and then seriously, everyone I know will have a newborn, or newborns. But that's ok, I don't have to get up every 3 hours right now, so it's a very very very small consolation for me. I do love my sleep-and my seafood. Good night-going to go dream of Amelie. And swordfish in a lemon buerre blanc sauce.

I broke down...

Oh boy. I said I wouldn't. I promised myself "not til we are out of the review room", but...I did it. I bought the Empress some too-cute-to-be-passed-up-plus-they-were-on-the-sale-rack clothes. Ok, I will try to be good from here on it, seeing that we have another two years, but it's going to be so hard. I almost bought her a winter outfit today-but there is two problems with that-we live in Florida(it's 86 here today) and I haven't a clue how big she will be her first Christmas here. We'll be off to Park City in three weeks, I may come back with a 2T ski outfit. I just may!

Another possible hold-up?

A couple of agencies are now confirming that if you are asked questions in the review room your dossier will be batched with whatever month is in the review room for your agency at the time that all questions are resolved. Right now they are reviewing Feb-April 2006. So, anytime between now and January, we can be called by our agency and asked to clarify some things. David was not able to get his birth certificate certified and authenticated in Colombia. We sent it along with a letter of explanation with our fingers, toes and every other body part crossed that they would accept it as is. If the CCAA won't move our file forward without it, David will have to trek back down to South America. That could take weeks or even months to do. I know, I am just working myself up into a tizzy as usual, but if that does happen, our file will no longer have an April LID date. It could be much much later, and as you know, they take 2-3 months to get though each LID month. In other words, if we are pushed back with the June LID files, it could mean an additional 4-6 months of waiting. Keep your happy thoughts on us so that they have NO QUESTIONS! I really need some part of these to go smoothly!

Material girl

I have to say, alot of people are giving Madonna critism on what appeared to be a spur of the moment decision to adopt from Africa. This is fact, not actually the case. According to Madonna, she actually was in the process of adopting for years and said it was the hardest thing she has ever been through (Amen, sista). She just did not publicize her desire to adopt, and really, who blames her? I love her response to a stupid question regarding the adoption in Time magazine:

"And by the way, say I did cut the queue? Say I did cheat and not have to wait two years to adopt a child? Well good for me! Do you know how many children are going to die in the next two years? It's a stupid law. Change the law."

I totally agree. I mean, I know they have to do background checks, doctors visits, ect on all of us waiting parents, but waiting more than a year for an orphan from any country is just wrong, especially for the children. See my previous post, which made me tear up while I was writing it. I haven't been a fan of her music since I myself was wearing leg warmers watching Family Ties and the Facts of Life, but you have to give this lady some respect.

Missing the good stuff

Today my friend Cynthia stopped by with her precious two week old baby girl Lily Anna. I got to hold her for a little while and smell that sweet newborn baby hair and watch her teeny face wrinkle up as she dreamed her innocent dreams. As I looked down at her, I was sad for a moment. You see, Amelie will be anywhere from 9-18 months when we meet her. Sure, I am a little sad for David and I that we won't have the chance to have a newborn in our arms to call our own, but I am more sad for Amelie. She will have 9 or 12 or 15 or 18 months with no one to comfort her cries in the middle of the night, no one to kiss her boo boo's when she falls down, no one to take seious note of her first crawl or first step. Yes, she will have nannies to witness some of her first's, but no one will jot down the dates of these first's in a baby book. No one will take pictures of her firsts and frame them on the fridge or on the dresser. I know she will be loved by the nannies at the orphanage, but she just won't have all of the love and attention a baby needs and deserves that first year of her life. We'll just have to somehow make up for at all when she is home, safe with her forever mom and dad.

Whew

Ok, I just want to say a big fat congrats to all of those August 9-25 LID'ers who got their referral today. The CCAA really had everyone on the edge of their seat not letting on as to when they were going to give out referrals. Even though they were a week late giving out referrals, they did 15% more than the usually do. This is a great sign. I hope they can continue to speed up. I hate to keep whining, but I just don't want to imagine waiting until the end of 2008 to meet Amelie! I miss my girl already. Is it possible to miss someone you have never met?

How to make 10,000 waiting families jump off a bridge

Ok, so the CCAA has not referred any babies to any families in the entire month of October. No word out of China as to why this is happening. No travel approval for families that have their referrals either. I can't even imagine what the people who were expecting referrals are feeling right now!

Rita Hayworth gave good face...vogue

What's up with the cheesey Vogue lyrics in the subject line? Saturday night we attended the first annual Dead Celebrities Ball at our dear friend Heather and Danny's home. I was, you guessed it, Rita Hayworth. Hubbins was Bruce Lee, although he kinda looked like a monk with his hair the way it was. The costume's were amazing, I won't describe everything, but a picture is worth 1000 words, so here are a few. Congrats to our friends Ana and Ron (friends who are also adopting or FWAAA-ha, ha) won best couple's costume, they were the Crocodile hunter and the stingray. Danny, the host got voted best male-he was Christopher Reeves, first as Clark Kent, then changed into Superman, but had a wheelchair and ventalator to boot. It was so wrong, but so very funny. My best friend from high school, whom I have seen twice since then 15 years ago also came. I think she had a very good time, but I think I broke her. Poor thing was not feeling so well the next day! Gotta run, lots of work to catch up with today and I am suppossed to be working right now, but a girl's gotta prioritize!

Today's episode is brought to you by the number 6

Today marks the 6th month anniversary of our Log In Date. When we started in Oct of last year with our paperwork, the referral date was 7 months after the LID. Ha, ha, ha. How times have changed. It's frustrating to think if we would have started our paperwork just 6 months earlier, we would be on our way. Now, we have to wait another 18-24 months. Trying to find the silver lining in this. We have decided to forgo all nursery decorating for at least another year. The closet in her room is still shut tight, I can't look at her clothes. I know several people in my April LID group that are done with their nursery's. I just can't imagine having it sit empty for what seems like an eternity, but I guess everyone deals with this in a different way. Here's to hoping and praying things speed up before I am too old to be a new mom!

Adventures in Babysitting-the sequel

A week ago I received an e-mail from Wendy and Ed, who got back a month ago from China to adopt their baby girl Samantha. They asked if we could watch Sammi for a few hours this afternoon. They sent this e-mail to David and I, as well as two other "waiting families" Ana and Ron & Kim and Todd. Well, they should have know that since we are all living vicariously through their lives as parents of an adorable little girl from China that we would all say "pick me, pick me!". I did in fact, respond in that exact manner. So, instead of choosing one couple to do the task, we all went over to watch the bambina. Well, Ron had last minute final plans that involved no diaper changing, but we didn't let David and Todd in on that dirty little secret so that they would still tag along with us womenfolk. So that left us with 5 adults and 1 small child, and therefore there was no napping. At least not for the small child. My husband did fall asleep on the couch for a bit, but who could blame him with the awful Dolphins game that was on (that is another story, what are they now, 1-6, seriously...I am burning my cute little dolphins tank top, or at least peeling the logo off, I digress again) . For a much more amusing take on this day...click on Ana's blog...see Gigi's Page over on the right. I am too pooped to be ha ha funny tonight. After all, our day started with just D and I teaching Sunday School to 15 kids. I liked the afternoon adult/child ratio much better! I will leave you with a few pics of our day with little miss Sunshine. She really is the best baby I have ever watched!

Need more assvice

Nope, this isn't about the adoption and how to keep myself from going nutso-but I have another factor in my life that may push me over the edge as well. My, make that Dave's; 12 year old cat, who has never scratched any furniture or done anything ill-behaved, has suddenly decided to start pissing and crapping on our couches. This morning was about the 6th or 7th time in the past two months. I don't know what brought it on, there is no new stresses for him to be concerned about, the dog is gone, no kids to taunt him (yet). Seriously, David is so lucky it's his cat, because if mine did that (and my perfect little Higgins would never ever do anything wrong), I would give him a new home. Under the wheel of my car. Any idea what a pain in the arse it is to remove the cushion covers, febreeze the crap out of the cushions, leave them in the sun, wash the covers 10 times and repeat twice a week? This is why I am a dog person, you can't exactly punish a cat like you can a dog and have them "get it". Not to mention the deep 8 inch scar on my thigh I have from trying to pick him up. Evil little creature. Yes, I know Ronnie, cat soup does sound like a good idea.

No sugar coating here

My lovely agency just sent out their bi-monthly newletter. For the first time (probably because of all the pressure us anxiety ridden parents are placing on them) they are being honest and up front about the timeframes. As you can see, based on our 04/24/06 LID, we are looking at an Oct 2008 referral and then traveling Dec 2008-Jan 2009. We started the process in July 2005. Once again, this wonderful, delightful, optimistic cheerful news makes me want to go down a lunch of chocolate, wine and prozac. Holy crimidy. And other not so nice pleasanties I can't write in case my church friends are reading. But believe me, I am cursing and throwing things as I write this. Anyone want to give me some assvice as to how to get back to my happy place?

August-08 LIDs: 3/31/2006 4/9/2006
September-08 LIDs: 4/10/2006 4/19/2006
October-08 LIDs: 4/22/2006 5/1/2006
November-08 LIDs: 5/2/2006 5/11/2006
December-08 LIDs: 5/12/2006 5/21/2006
January-09 LIDs: 5/24/2006 6/2/2006

Too much time on my hands

If you have a minute...check out this facial recognition website. I did a few pics and another less flattering one pulled up Bridgit Fonda and Jennifer Love Hewitt. I used to get told all the time that I look like Brigit Fonda. I'm not complaining, poor David had Sean Astin and George W Bush. Poor guy!

Warning: Joke in very bad taste to follow

My brother sent me this:

Q: How can you tell the difference between a Democrat and a Republican?

A: A Democrate uses bookmarks, while a Republican prefers his pages bent over.

Bad, I know. I actually tried to contact Foley's office to help me with out whole USCIS/I-171H mess. His office never got back to me. I should have sent David into Mr. Foley's office dressed as a school boy. We'd be in China by now. I wish I'd known then what I know now!

And speaking of Chinese culture

David and I went to the coolest Asian boutique yesterday. He bought a really great black "pajama" outfit and some numchucks(I can't spell and I am too lazy to use spellcheck). It has a big black dragon on the front. He is going as Bruce Lee for a "Dead Entertainers" Halloween party we are attending. I'll be Rita Hayworth, but I'll get into that after the event....

I tried on a few of the dresses in the store, just for shits and giggles. I thought I'd get one for the Chinese New Year and Harvest Moon festivals. Let me 'splain something to you Lucy, if you are ever feeling thin and want to change that thinking, go to one of these stores and try on the clothes. I kid you not, I was an XXL. I wanted to cry. A large is a size 2, a XL is a 4 and so on and so forth. Who are the small's made for, smurfs? Mediums are for the Nicole Ritchies of this world. Not to mention, they are made in the shape of a box. By the time I found a size to fit my booty, I could have taken a tire off of my car, put my body through the middle of it and sit it at my waist, and it would have fit around the middle. Maybe they would make good maternity clothes since the hips and waist are the same size. Anyone knows anyone who can sew? I'll have to have a handmade one! Guess the only shopping I will be doing in China is for pearls and jade, not that that is a bad thing!

Celebrations

I have many many fond memories of the holidays with my family from age two and up. I cannot wait until we start our own traditions with Amelie. In addition to Christmas, Thanksgiving and Easter (and the all popular Groundhogs Day, ha, ha), we will have the opportunity to celebrate several Chinese holidays as well. Many FCC families feel strongly about incorporating Chinese culture into our children's lives, but not shove it down their their throats. It's a very delicate balance. We intend to introduce the Chinese Holidays to Amelie and gently encourage her to take Mandarin language classes. If she becomes more or less interested in all of these things, we will allow her to delve into them more, or steer away from them, whatever her choice is.

One of the big Chinese holidays that just passed is the Harvest Moon Festival. The Moon festival (also called the Mooncake or Mid-Autumn festival) falls on October 6 in the year 2006. What is the Moon festival? Every year on the fifteenth day of the eighth month of the lunar calendar, when the moon is at its maximum brightness for the entire year, the Chinese celebrate "zhong qiu jie." Children are told the story of the moon fairy living in a crystal palace, who comes out to dance on the moon's shadowed surface. The legend surrounding the "lady living in the moon" dates back to ancient times, to a day when ten suns appeared at once in the sky. The Emperor ordered a famous archer to shoot down the nine extra suns. Once the task was accomplished, Goddess of Western Heaven rewarded the archer with a pill that would make him immortal. However, his wife found the pill, took it, and was banished to the moon as a result.

Luckily for us, we don't have to try to create this festival by ourselves. The FCC community does a fantatic job recreating this event in Palm Beach County. I am very much looking forward to attending with our daughter!

Dave's blog

David started his very own blog. His is a little more heartfelt, a little less sarcastic and a not full of much-ado-about-nothings like this site! It's deep man. Hey-ya gotta have balance. Check it out! www.ouryangnu.com Like mine, except leave out the blogspot part

dog days

After another night of sneezing, itchy red eyes and a runny nose, we decided to let Henry to go another family this morning. A freind of the previous owner who has a few kids and a fenced in yard just lost their boxer to a car accident last week. We decided to give him to their family. I miss him and his big beautiful blue eyes, but he will be much happier there. After all that drama begging David for a dog. We are wheaten people anyhow, it'll happen again : (

Welcome home Sammi!

Last night our good friends Ed and Wendy and their baby Samantha returned home to the US from China. Several of us crazy FCC families went down to the airport to greet them with big signs and alot of noise. We are planning on making this a tradition. We are so happy for them...finally, a family at last! Congrats!

Almost home!

We saw the puppies today! We saw the puppies today! I think I decided to name our new little monster after my grandfather Henrico and call him Henry. It just seems more fitting than Finnegan but the jury is still out. What do you think? All 9 of the puppies were outside running around, but ours would take just a step or two then fall asleep on the grass. I hope he just has narcolepsy and isn't unhealthy! We'll go see him one more time Saturday before he comes home with us next Wednesday.

Here are a few pics of him. In the last one, he was drinking some water when one of his sisters came and sat on his head. Too cute!

As the world turns

I can't believe it's been a year since we turned in our application to our agency. My life seems like a soap opera in one very peculiar way. No, my husband is not having an affair with my evil twin sister, nor did I just come back from the dead and find my best friend married to my father, who it turns out is not really my father but my brother or perhaps my uncle. You know how if you watch a soap opera once a year, it's like the same thing is happening, nothing is really moving forward? It's like the writers drag out a story line for like, years at a time. Anyhow, I do lately feel just like that. Any progress with your adoption? Nope. Is your file in the review room? Nope. Any word as to how long it will be? Nope.

Ah well, maybe my life is more like the movie Groundhog's Day.

Well, starting next week I'll have another distraction from the wait. A soon to be 70 pound drolling shedding panting smelly lovable distraction. Can't wait!

CCAA Roller Coaster

Good news this morning, the CCAA referred/matched 18 days worth of LID's this month. Over the last 6 months, the days referred ranged from 5-9 days. So, maybe it won't take 2-3 years. If they keep this up, it will take 19-20 months. Yesterday was month #5 in the waiting game for us. If I was pregnant pregnant and not paper pregnant, I'd have a big belly and be more than halfway through. So, we still have a long way to go, but at least temporarily there is a little brighter outlook.

The CCAA just finished reviewing December 2005 LID files and word has it they are already looking at some March 2006's. Ours is April 2006 and I can breathe out, just a little, when we are past that stage. (In case you are confused, your file goes through two stages over there, the review room and then the matching room). David was never able to obtain the elusive "certification and authentication" stamps from his home country. I have a bad feeling the CCAA is going to demand this, and it will be back to South America for David so he can get that done. Keep your toes and fingers and everything else crossable, well, crossed!

Happy couple

This weekend I had the honor of co-hosting an engagement party for our good friends Wendy and Claus. It was luau themed and it was a success! Too much food, but never too many laughs were had by all. They are getting hitched on the same yacht that D and I had our reception on 5 1/2 years ago, so I will actually get to enjoy the wedding from a guest's point of view! Ours was such a whirlwind, that as much work as I put into it, I barely had time to sit back and completely take everything in. I can't wait until thiers. Hopefully the way our dance lessons are going, we'll be pretty good by then!

Speaking of dancing, I am totally hooked to Dancing with the Stars! I loved it last year, but now that I know the basics(and maybe a little more) of the Tango, Foxtrot, Cha Cha, Rhumba, Salsa, Waltz and as of today's lesson the beginning of the Hustle(stop laughing, really stop now, you are hurting my feelings : ) ), I really appreciate the moves the celebrities make. Plus, have you seen the legs on these dancers? Holy moly! Of course, that is their life and since no one is paying me to dance and I can only spend a few hours a week in the studio, the weight isn't exactly dropping off. Probably doesn't help that I come home with the munchies and eat half a bag of lime tortilla chips. I am sure those dancers satisfy their hunger with a tic tac and a half a grape. Whatever!

Itsy bitsy bits of hopeful news?/ I heart Clay

If you have wandered over to the Rumor Queen website(and why would you unless you are adopting), for the first time in a very long time, there is an aire of optimism regarding the wait. Many people are hearing through the grapevine that the wait is going to stabalize from 14-18 months. That would mean at 18 months, we would have a referral next October and travel in December. THAT would be fan-friggin-tastic. Eighteen months sounds like heaven compared to the 2-3 year wait. Not getting my hopes up yet, but at the least the woah-is-me syndrome has subsided a bit.

Then there's this, a letter I received from House of Representatives member Clay Shaw:

Thank you for contacting me with your support for the Helping Families Adopt Orphans Act (H.R.5888). You will be pleased to know that I am a consponsor of this bill.

H.R. 5888 was introduced by Rep Heather Wilson of NM on 07/25/06. As you know, the bill would direct the Secretary of the U.S. Dept of Homeland Security to ensure that an individual may file an orphan petition for at least two years after approval of an advanced processing application.

H.R. 5888 was referred to the full House Judiciary Committee. Please know that I support H.R. 5888 should it come before the full U.S. House of Representatives for consideration.

Thank you again for contacting me.

Sincerely, E. Clay Shaw, Jr Member of Congress

New puppy pic

Here is my little man at just 3 weeks. I just want to eat him up!

Houston we have a problem

Finally! Here are a few pics from the trip : )

Greetings from Margaritaville

As promised, I would share some rather unflattering pictures of David from this weekend in Key West. Ok, so he won't let me in case he runs for President, but I am sharing a few of all of us from our wonderful weekend. We first stopped at Robbie's in Islamorada on the way down-in case you've never been stop on the way down to KW-it's mile marker 75.5. You pay a few bucks to go out on the docks and feed these ginormous tarpon-I'm talking 6-7 feet long and 150 pounds. I had a great video of David trying to feed them, a few of them jumped out of the water and D squeeled like a 6 year old school girl. At least he got close to them, I was a total chicken.

The rest of the weekend was a whirlwind, it was our friend Ty's first time in KW, so we wanted to show him every inch (of the island you naughty fools-although it is KW and we did try to go to one clothing optional bar but it was empty). We rented bikes and cycled to all of the mandatory historical spots. We were dying of heat, and most of our stops were of the National Lampoon's Vacation type (take a picture and run). I won't bore you dear people with every detail, but there were some highlights: we went to this great shack by the water called Bo's Fish House-it looked like it was falling down and held together with chewing gum, there was a dirt floor, cats running around a few manaquins (sp?) laying around too. Note the picture of David sitting by the one that looks like a giant Ken doll. During the sunset at Mallory Square that evening, Ty somehow ended up in a Straight Jacket briefly in a part of one of the sideshows. I took a few pictures of the gorgeous sunset right after, not a bad job, is it?

Quick thank you to Jamie and Ted who were great hosts! They live in a fabulous house right north of Key West and let us stay there for a few nights. You are the best!

Sept 11th

Today marks the 5 year anniversary of a very horrible day in our country's history. It is one that I pray we will never see the likes of again. Everyone, in their lifetime experiences at least one moment in time so shocking, they forever define the moment by where they were, what they saw, what they felt... where were you when Kennedy was shot, or when the shuttle exploded , Pearl Harbor... every generation has at least one. I was not yet born when the JFK assasination occured, I came along decades after D-day, and barely remember the Challenger tradgedy. I am just grateful my child did not have to witness the 09/11 event. She is probably not even born yet.

I will always remember exactly where I was on that Tuesday. I was working at NCCI and the whole office, like every other one across the country, stopped. When I heard that a plane hit that building, I went numb. I have never been so terrified in my life. The office and everyone in it grinded to a halt as we all crowded around computer screens watching live video streams from the twin towers, the silence and gasps as the first tower crashed to the ground. We were all too stunned to continue to work. My brother was working at the Pentagon at that time. My manager let me go home so I could get in touch with my family. Because cell phones were virtually down that day, it took at least 6 hours for my brother to finally be able to contact my mother. Yes, many people died at the Pentagon that day, just over 200, but I thank God that the plane hit a section of the building that was all but unoccupied. It could have been much worse for them, and for my family. My old manager had a brother who was a NYC police officer, he died in the WTC that day. My family was blessed. My brother and I are much closer now I think, and a part of me believes it has to do with this day. I don't think he reads my blog, but if you do, I love you Bo Bo.

On this 5th Anniversay, may each of the surviving family members and friends of the victims of 9/11 find peace in their life and the ability to truly survive and continue on with life.

Margaritaville Bound

Gosh, my little blog has been so boring and un-funny, I can't even bear to read it lately! Really nothing new and interesting to report-adoption or elsewise. Time for a quick vacation (sans family, although I love them all...um yes sans family would be nice). We are headed to Key West aka Cayo Hueso in a few days. It will be so nice to shop-eat-drink-tan-sleep-repeat(not necessarily in that order) for three whole days! If I'm lucky I'll have a few pictures of D is some comprimising situations to post.

After this trip, we'll have to stay put for a bit because our little one will be home soon. No, not that little one. The dog-little one. Well, he'll only be little for a few weeks. I forgot to mention to D that labs can get to be 100 pounds. Shhhhh.......

Till next week!

Ernie was a big wuss

If you listened to the local media, Ernesto was a cat 5 monster. I have plenty of friends who put up shutters and are no doubt spending the day in their little caves. I am so glad, and so is D, that we decided to leave the shutters to collect at least a few more weeks of dust and cobwebs in the garage. Ernie didn't pack much of a punch, wind or rain-wise, but we still had a small hurricane, I mean tropical storm, I mean tropical depression, ok... passing shower gathering at our neighbors. They all played a card game and I played a few rounds, but mostly I passed the time stalking the new puppies. Here are a few of the now week old pups. They are starting to resemble some sort of canine. If you want to see what Finnigan will look like, there is a picture of proud papa Kiro(yellow in Japanese). Notice they all have pinkish brown noses just like their daddy. I think that is really cool because almost every yellow lab has a black nose, so Finni will be different. I hope the next 5 weeks fly by, I can't wait to bring him home!

The good, the bad, and the ugly

First the good: Meet Finnigan, the newest member of our family. Well, he will be in 6 more weeks. He is a yellow lab pup, but right now he looks like the cross between a guinea pig and a chihuahua. He's only 5 days old right now. Oh yeah, David caved. And I can't rotate the picture, I am a dummy. The little girl is our neighbor Shiori-one of the little girl's who are the owners of Finnigan's mom and dad. I can't wait to watch him grow! Of course, I already stocked up on toys, fancy bowls and other stuff. I've gotta spoil him, he's gotta follow in the footsteps of Quincy, the best dog ever...

The bad: We may have another guest, well, I am certain of it. His name is Ernesto and he is, or will be by tomorrow, a hurricane.

The ugly: I know, I know, stop reading Rumor Queen. The newest, most horrifying word is the the CCAA may impose new restrictions, and strict ones at that, immediately. By immediately I mean no grandfathering in those with log-in-dates. Some of the restrictions that are rumored about would kick us, and 50% of everyone else right out of the program. Like the soup nazi, NO BABY FOR YOU. Seriously, you can just lock me up right now if that happens. So, please, say a little prayer, wish on a rainbow, even rub your voodoo doll if you must, but just send good wishes this way. I need it.

August referrals are here

Well, the CCAA manages to get through a whole 9 days this time. Woo-hoo. They have been averaging this for the last 6 months. At this pace, we are looking at a 3 year wait. Ay-carrumba. I just opened a fortune cookie from the restaurant last night-it says "You will soon be crossing the great waters"-yeah, whatever.

Adoption for Dummies

Last night we met a few other FCC couples at Pei Wei for our bi-monthly dinner. After we finished eating, us gals decided to surprise out hubbies with a "Adoption for Dummies" trivia game. I was very proud of David, he came in a tie second place. Ed, who is traveling to get their little Samantha next month with his wife Wendy, won the game with a tie breaker question. His grand prize was a 6 pack of beer. The other boys good booby prizes-candy and slim jims. It was a riot. I think Pei Wei staff hates us, one of the girls went to the bathroom and came back and said "dear Lord, I can hear you guys from inside the stall", nice. Well, I guess since we are such a rowdy crowd we'll have to go to Chucky Cheese, but I am trying hard to never step foot in there, kid or not! I think the boys are threatening to give us their version of a trivia game, it'll probably involve questions on playboy centerfolds, NASCAR and computer parts.

Here is a picture of the boys after the game with their prizes. It looks like they have been drinking, but all we had was tea and sodas! The girls picture wasn't so flattering, my hair was all frizzy from the rain, so I'll pass on posting it.

One thing that came out of our dinner...we decided we are going to the airport at midnight when the Spector's come back from China with their baby and we are wearing our pj's and slippers (that is slippers, not strippers, Ron). We'll do it again in September when Ed and Wendy come back. It'll be so nice to see friendly faces when you get off of that 20 plus hour flight!

Happy 4 month anniversary

Ok, so I haven't celebrated monthly anniversaries since David and I's first year of dating back in college. I haven't eaten ramen noodles or drank nickle beers since then either. Alas, here I am looking forward to the 24th of each month, counting the days sloooowly, sloooowly. For everyone who promised the time would fly by I have one thing to say to you...Liar, Liar, Pants on Fire! Tomorrow will mark 4 months since the day we were LID (reminder for those of you international adoption for dummy readers-LOG IN DATE). I am in my second of probably eight trimesters-or octomesters more like it. I look pretty damn good for being 4 months (paper) pergnant, not even a pound have I gained! Of course, this is partially an effort by (shameless plug warning)-the detox treatment I got at my friend Amy's new spa Radiance (it's on the corner of Congress and Boynton Bch Blvd by the Pier One-tell her Kristen sent you : ) ).

We will celebrate with our fellow FCC gang at Pei Wei tomorrow night. The wives thought we'd make a trivia game for the guys since they are pretty much clueless abut the whole process. I am far from the only one who did 99% of the research and the paperwork and just said "sign here". People ask D what our LID is and he gives them a deer in the headlights expression. I think I'll start with the Jeapordy $100 questions for him-Ok, David-This is the country we are adopting from . Um, what is um, um, shut. I'll pass. More later on who won.

Sun, sand and boogies

D and I headed to Sanibel during the past weekend. It's a very quiet little island on the west side of Florida and it reminds me alot of what the Keys looked like when I grew up there. Not alot to do, just some island shopping, sunning and not much else. It was nice! We stayed with my brother, sis in law and their munchkins (3 now, 2 more on the way). We rented bikes and mozzied(am I spelling that correctly?) around the island. Here is a picture of the lighthouse and the beach. Had to include a few pics of baby Micheal from this morning, I caught a few candids of him on the other side of the patio door. What a cutie!

Quilt square update

I just counted...I have 108! Yeah! But, if you didn't get me yours(hellloooooo family on both sides...) I am still pleading to include one from you!

And the long wait continues

More confirmation that our wait will be a very long one. Our big China agency only just predicted that the CCAA will only refer two weeks of LID's per month from now on. That puts us at March 2008 for a referral and travel in May or June 2008-which is when the Olympics in Bejing are being held. Not good, not good. Putting fingers in ears and saying "la,la, la,la, la...I can't hear you...la,la,la,la,la...."!

A Few Good Eggs

Reading a really funny book right now that is helping me deal with the whole infertility thing. The first few months after our LID, I kept thinking "yippeeeee...we are off to China eventually!". Now that a few months have passed, the initial excitement has worn off and my thoughts have turned to: "we may not get to China for a few years and the fact that everyone around me is pregant and probably will be a time OR TWO more is really getting me down, man".

I picked up the book "A Few Good Eggs" and it has definatly helped me cope by allowing me to realize that my feeling of "womb" envy are quite validated. The book kinda like "taking Charge of Your Fertility" meets "Sex in the City". It goes on to say that it's ok if I turn down alot of baby showers right now, particulary if the person isn't one of my close friends. For close friends, the book says, suck it up and put a smile on your face. Now, for those of you reading this whose shower I did turn down this year (Neal, Janna, Sori), I really did have other events planned for that day. I have witnesses, I have alibis! It's ok to vent a little when someone else gets pregnant, but not to the person who is actually pregnant. I have been doing well so far by living up to these rules of infertility living. Right? Right?

Another section of the book titled "when people you love say stupid things" really had me cracking up. I have heard so many of these comments, especially number 1 and 4, and I heard both of these on Sunday. So, here is "what not to say to a friend experiencing infertility":
1. Just don't think about it, and it will happen!
2. Maybe you're trying too hard. (Which is the same thing as, don't stress about it and it will happen. That has NOTHING to do with old, sleepy eggs and two headed sperm-yes, it's a real thing)
3. But I bet it's fun trying (sure, it's a blast and so romantic with the thermometer and all)
4. Just start to adopt-then you'll get pregnant! That happened to my friend's sister's hairdresser's cousin's teacher.
5. You are really lucky-you can do anything you want. We never get to go out anymore.
6. Don't worry, your'e still young. (Actually, now that I am 33, my eggs are going faster than a speeding bullett-sorry that is the most clever thing I can come up with on my Benedrly haze)
7. Anything new on the baby front?
8. Are you keeping your legs up after sex?
9. Does your husband wear boxers?
10. Are you taking your temperature?
11. Are you using and ovulation predictor kit? (I had someone ask me that a few weeks ago, I said rather sarcastically before I could stop myself "No, what are those?". I have in actuality spend hundreds on those in the course of two years)
12. You should probably have more sex.
13. You probably need a vacation.
14. I get pregnant just by looking at my husband. (I used to get this a-lot)
15. Give it time.
16. You can have my kids, they drive me nuts.

One in 5 couples over the age of 30 experience infertility. If you know a married couple and they don't have a baby within a few years of marriage, there is a good chance they are having issues. Maybe they just don't want kids yet or ever, but chances are they are having issues and don't feel like discussing it. I am an open book, too much so sometimes, but others aren't. I now know not to ask the dreaded "So, when are you going to have a baby"?

If you have a friend who is experiencing infertility the best thing you can say is "I don't want to keep asking you about the baby stuff, if you need to chat/vent/cry, please know I am here for you".

That is our lesson for today, class!

Bon Festival

Last night we attended the Bon Festival at the Morakomi Japenese Gardens in Delray. For those of you who don't know, Obon (Bon Festival) is a Buddhist event and one of the most important traditions for Japanese people. It is the period of praying for the repose of the souls of one's ancestors. People believe that their ancestors' spirits come back to their homes to be reunited with their family during obon. I thought of my Dad and Quincy and Aunt Teri quite a bit last night, even though I am not Buddest nor Japenese (really, shocked, aren't you?) We had a great time, even though it was 182 degrees at 7 pm. Of course the reason I really wanted to go was to see all of the little Asian girls dressed in their kimonos. And plenty I saw! Our neighbors were there, and their little girls are part Japenese. They had their summer kimonos on and spent most of the night playing some Japenese game that allows you to catch a goldfish (not unlike those days at the fair trying to throw ping-pong balls into the goldfish bowls). I swear I am going to kidnap one of them one day, I am in love with them! Ok, patience Kristen, and her mom might not be too happy. I was going to post a picture, but it is taking an hour to download!

FCC friends

David and I have been so lucky to be in a circle of a great bunch of couples who are also on this crazy adoption roller coaster. We started getting to know each other at the end of last year through "waiting families" meetings and discussed everything from serious subjects such as attachment issues to not so serious subjects such as should the $3500 cash we are required to take to China be shoved in our bras or in our underwear. In the past few months we have "kicked it up a notch" to use Emerril's line. We now get together once a month or so and have dinner or a bbq. Not only do I feel like I have a special connection to these people because of the adoption, but all of our little girls will be good friends as well. It's so important that our daughters have their "Chinese sisters" to relate to and bond with. I am very much looking forward to that chapter in my life. I just wish it was happening quicker(we have the latest LID of the group) , but in the meantime, I'll enjoy watching all of our FCC friends bring their babies home!

mean hubby!

So, there is now another pregnant girl in my building...that makes 7. Her name is Missy and she is brown. She would give me her baby, but David said no. Now before you read that sentece twelve times...Missy is a chocolate lab and the daddy is a yellow lab. Her human parents will give us one for free! But no....David is a big meanie, he doesn't like the shedding. I have to do some serious whining over the next few weeks! Wish me luck!

Cheeseball Alert!

So, D and I started dance lessons of the latin type last night...samba, salsa, rhumba, swing (yup, it's considered a latin dance). Go ahead, laugh it up. This reminds me of one of my favorite scenes from 40 year old virgin.."Hey, you know how I know your'e gay?". It was a blast though. I thought I would do horrible, since I got kicked out of ballet when I was 4. My coordination has somehow improved during the last 29 years! I was actually quite impressed with myself, so was David. Even the instructor told us that we moved ahead much more quickly than 90% of his students. Then again 90% of his students are well, 90 I think.

Anyhow, if anyone is interested, they have three private lessons for just $20. It's a good "waiting for referral" distraction! We signed up for 20 lessons, we should be ready for season 5 of "So, you think you can dance?"! HA!

One small step....

Yesterday we received a nice surprise in the mail, it was the long awaited "brown envelope" . The brwon envelope is a letter from the American Consulate General in China acknowdedging that we have been approved by the INS to adopt an orphan from China. It doesn't really mean too much, it's just nice to know that they still have our file. The CCAA just moved offices over in China, and I was paranoid that our file would end up in a black hole! Right now, the reveiw room is going through the November 2005 files. Once our file is out of the review room(hopefully by the end of the year) we can breathe easier. After the review room, it goes to the matching room, which will take months and months and months. I believe we are still on track for an early 2008 referral, or early 2007 if we are lucky.

I added a new link on the right...it's a website desined specifically for April 2006 DTC families such as ourselves. We are called the Flying Tigers. It's nice to be able to chat with people who are in our same timeframe. We also do quilt square, kids books and secret pal swaps, it certainly helps to pass the time!

Everybody Hates Chris

No, not the show...never watched it. I am talking about the lovely little storm brewing by Puerto Rico and moving towards us. I feel like we just took our shutters down, and we did, just 9 months ago with Wilma. We are well prepared this year-we have a monster generator(good, becuase I just bought 3 weeks worth of groceries since David apparently couldn't find the store while I was up north). As Jimmy B would sing in one of his songs...tryin to reason with hurricane season.....

Back to the sunshine state!

I am so happy to be back to "cool" weather! It was 102 degrees when I left Maryland this morning. Holy Crap! It was too hot to do anything up there, so we couldn't do as many touristy things as usual, but I'll save those for when David and I drive up in the spring. We did get to go down to the Inner Harbor, went shopping and went to the Science center to see two Imax movies in 3-D. Saw a bunch of my family on Saturday and went to a very cool up-and-coming neighborhood called Canton for dinner and drinks last night. I had a prikley pear margarita and a quesadilla stuffed with crab, spinach, shitake, roasted red peppers and goat cheese. As if that wasn't enough to gorge myself on, we hit Vicarros(the famous Italian bakery) for a chocolate dipped cannolli afterwards. I cannot wait to get my butt back to the gym. The jeans that I had on the way up are too tight now. Embarassing but whatever.

On a very very ecstatic happy note, our friends Wendy and Ed received their referral yesterday for their daughter Samantha. She is too cute! The orphanages just love to dress the kids like they are going snowmobiling in Antartica for their pictures! I'll try to add a picture when I can, but I need to ask if they mind first!

Ok, off to unpack and smootch on my honey!